From Mail & Guardian Online

[Paris Hilton] on Tuesday appealed to fans to sign an online petition urging California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to commute her 45-day sentence for driving while disqualified. "If the late former president Gerald Ford could find it in his heart to pardon former president Richard Nixon after his mistake(s)," reads the appeal, "we undeniably support Paris Hilton being pardoned for her honest mistake as well, and we expect that the governor will understand and grant this unusual but important request."

First of all, who in the Water World would be a Paris Hilton fan? Someone hoping one day to be an alcoholic? A drug addict? A whore? Someone who loves bad acting? Someone who loves staying at Hilton hotels? I don't get it.

I love the whole Hilton as Nixon thing. They're so much a like. Let's see Nixon opened up diplomatic relations with China, helped create the EPA, reformed the postal service, indexed Social Security for inflation and added Supplemental security income. And Paris Hilton gave us a remake of House of Wax. So I can see how they're the same.

Meh, what is with some people?

Labels: drugs, Nixon, paris hilton

Apparently the mixture of Tylenol PM and heroin is known as "cheese." I wonder how many visitors to this site get here thinking it's some kind of pro-drug website. Whatever, people spun out on heroin will probably like this better than normal people anywhere.

At any rate, not knowing the above information would make the headline featured in The Dallas Morning News confusing:

Suspect arrested in teen's fatal 'cheese' overdose

Labels: cheese, cheesegod.com, drugs

I was reading the latest Nintendo Power today, I do so as to fit in with the rest of the kids, and I noticed the above advertisement.

There are a number of things about this ad that either confuse me, I find interesting, I find interesting because it confuses me, or I find so interesting that I get confused how I could find something this mundane of any interest.

First, this kid is ugly. He looks like Charlie Brown if someone sat on his head. He also is either very limber, or his bones somehow can bend. Perhaps his pot is for medicinal purposes because of the severe pain he's in from his boneitus. Maybe he's smoking it because he's so ugly that, um, I don't know, I guess there's not really any reason why you smoke pot because you were ugly.

This kid also seems to only have one wall in his house. And his only furniture is a pillow and a pot plant. Maybe this ad is trying to tell us that if you waste all your money on pot you can't afford to have such luxurious things like chairs, or walls, or a color besides mustard yellow.

But the main message here seems to be that smoking a joint will make you too lazy to walk the dog and you'll lose his respect. This guy's house will not only have a horrible smell of marijuana, but also will stink of dog crap and dog urine because no one taking the dog out. It's a good thing that this guy is missing a wall, it'll help air the place out.

Labels: anti-drug, dogs, drugs, marijuana, nintendo, pot, weed